Dear You, 

There’s a quiet unraveling that can begin in midlife.
You might not notice it all at once—but one day, the mirror feels unfamiliar.
The things that used to bring joy feel dull.
The lightness between you and your partner is harder to find.
And deep down, you might be wondering, “Where did I go?”

If you're feeling off in ways you can’t quite explain—more anxious, more sensitive, more short-tempered, more everything—you are not crazy. You are not failing. And you are definitely not alone.

This is perimenopause. Or menopause.
And it’s not just hot flashes and missed periods—though those can be brutal.

It’s rage that hits you out of nowhere, like a wave you didn’t see coming.
It’s feeling like you're walking around with no skin—everything grates, everyone needs something, and you’re just… done.
It’s the quiet scream inside when someone calls you “hormonal” or jokes about your mood.
It’s the bone-deep resentment that no one warned you about this, that you're supposed to keep functioni...

I'm a relationship therapist who experienced a separation. The question I am asked the most is "How did you save your own marriage?" Here's my honest answer....

This year will be 32 years since we first fell in love. It feels surreal to think about how much time has passed, and while I wish I could say it's been a simple, happily-ever-after love story, the reality is far more colourful.

We've had our fair share of ups and downs, and yes, at about the 18 year mark things fell apart. There were long moments when we couldn’t quite find each other, times when our connection slipped away, and loneliness crept into places that once held joy. The distance wasn't just physical; it was emotional too—a vast canyon that seemed impossible to bridge.

In those stretches, doubt would whisper in my ear, telling me that maybe this was it, that perhaps we had grown too far apart to ever find our way back. The pain of disconnection was sharp and unrelenting, filled with misunderstandings and unmet exp...